Taking the Bull by the Horns

Having an operational computer in one's classroom is sometimes a dangerous thing.

So I e-mailed the C.hildren's A.id So.ciety again (I was channeling Sew at the time, I also phoned and left a voice mail!). This time from a different section of the website and this is the response that I received:

Hello JellyBelly,

I am an Adoption Worker at your local C.hildren's A.id S.ociety and am responding to your adoption inquiry.

You should be aware that most of the children we place for adoption are between 3-12 years old. Therefore, we are looking for families who are able to adopt children in this age range. We also have a need for families who are willing to consider a family history of a major mental illness or prenatal alcohol and drug abuse. If you are open to these possibilities, you can call me to discuss your request. I can be reached at 90*-3**-6***, Ext. 30** and am available Monday to Friday, 9-5 pm.

If this is your first inquiry about adoption I would recommend that you check the website, www.adoptontario.ca. This website provides an overview of public adoption as well as profiles of children presently available for adoption in Ontario.

For further information about other options such as private and international adoption, you could check the website, www.adoption.on.ca.

The Adoption Council of Ontario hosts "How to Adopt Seminars" and information about these sessions is posted on their website. These seminars are held in your city and one nearby.

Thank-you for contacting your Ch.ildren's Ai.d S.ociety and I wish you all the best on your adoption journey.

Regards,

Adoption Worker

Lucky for me I did my research. I've read through the recommended websites more than once (meaning that I read them a bit obsessively) in the past four and a half years.

So when I read Mr. JB the e-mail he seemed a bit hesitant.

I'm pretty resigned to the fact that doing adoption this way means that we probably will not get an infant. And as the e-mail says, the children may have health issues. I'm open to a child with learning difficulties or even a disability, but Mr. JB isn't 100% about that.

A couple of months ago I was reading a wonderful book that I heard about on the C.BC. It was about a dad (who is a public radio personality and an author) and his struggle parenting his severely disabled son. I was absolutely riveted by the story. I suggested that Mr. JB read the book but he wasn't too keen on the idea. He is forever saying that I read depressing stuff and that I need to lighten up.

Ever since I read the book I have felt that perhaps I have a calling to parent a child with difficulties.

When I was in elementary school there was a girl with Down Syndrome in my class. In the seventh grade I was paired up with her for industrial arts class. We became very close. We even had a crush on the same boy! My classmates and I were very protective of her. If anyone made fun of her we would stick up for her. At the end of the school year she moved and I cried and cried on the last day of school. I couldn't believe how attached I was to her.

As a teacher I seem to like the hard to like kids. It always seems like the odd kids gravitate towards me and I just love it. My favourite kid last year can be one of the most frustrating children in the primary division. My school librarian was lamenting on how he threw himself on the floor because there were too many books to choose from.

Do you know what my response was?

"Oh he's so cute! He used to do stuff like that when he was in my class. I would sit with him and rub his back for a little while and then he'd calm down."

The librarian looked at me like I was nuts.

I have no idea what all of this means. What I do know is that I am completely open to adopting an older child and that I'm open to a child with disabilities.

Needless to say, I'm phoning the adoption worker tomorrow. I know that we have to attend classes in order to become eligible to adopt in my province. We are going to have plenty of time to digest all of the different faces of adoption.

Oh what a ride this is going to be!

p.s. I'm starting the "room that was to be a nursery" clean out next week. I'm going to chronicle it here so I'm accountable. I'm going to need a lot of encouragement to get it done, it is very painful to be in there.