My journey to stay hopeful in my quest for baby JellyBelly
20 January 2009
100
So here I am folks, my 100th post.
I was hoping for something more poignant and moving, but unfortunately I'm not feeling very creative. Sorry.
First off, I have to apologize to All You Who Hope. I meant to get the B6 in the mail for you this past weekend, but unfortunately my stomach was not cooperating. I spent most of Sunday in bed with horrible stomach cramps. The only thing that I did was go to mass (and was in agonizing pain for most of it) and lie down. Then I was going to try getting it in the mail yesterday, but I work up feeling all clammy and headachy and after I had my breakfast (I was all dressed, made up and ready to go to work) I threw up THREE times. I can't remember the last time this has happened to me.
Needless to say Mr. JB called the secretary of my school and the automated absence taker for my school board to get me a supply teacher. The only good thing about getting sick on a Monday was that my gastroenterologist works out of her office on Mondays and Wednesday only. When I spoke to her fabulous secretary she took pity on me and squeezed me in for an appointment. My GI is a great lady and as soon as I sat down in the exam room I felt better already.
She went over my symptoms and did an examination of my belly and she thinks that it is not colitis related. Thank God! She told me to take milk of magnesia or magnesium citrate to get de-bunged up (that what my doctor said! How funny!). I took it last night and I functioned like a normal human being.
My supply teacher had my class do a journal entry about me being sick. The kids were so excited to see me this morning and it was the first thing that they told me. For some reason since coming back from Christmas vacation the kids have been obsessed with me sleeping. One of the kids even said (in almost perfect French!):
Mme JB a fait dodo hier parce qu'elle est malade (Mme JB slept yesterday because she was sick.).
Not bad since they came to my class in September with no knowledge of the French language at all!
Then of course when I told them what had happened yesterday morning they all had to tell me puke stories! It took quite a while to settle them down, but we finally got to our calendar routine!
I wish that I was feeling more reflective about reaching my 100th post. I'm so grateful that I made the first courageous step of creating my blog. I've been so silent in my real life about my struggles with IF that it's strange that I've created a space where anyone from anywhere can read my most personal thoughts. I've even stopped keeping my own private journal which is quite a feat since I've kept one since the fourth grade!
I hoped a year ago that I would be chronicling my adventures as a mother, or at least as a pregnant woman. I've oscillated between have no hope to having so much. I am also so grateful for my wonderful friends that have given me so much support and advice. I have a special shout out to Aurelia Cotta who recommended the Marguerite Bourgeoys Family Centre to me. If it wasn't for her I don't know how long it would've taken me to discover NaproTechnology and the Creighton Method.
I know now after 3 and a 1/2 years of trying to make a baby that I am finally nearing a definite diagnosis as to why we are still childless. I am so looking forward to my appointment on Thursday afternoon -- really, I've never been so excited to go to see a new doctor!!! I know that I may have to wait for my surgery, at least I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I wish that I could go back to the evil infertility clinic and punch the stupidhead (I have more severe language that I use when describing him, but I'm not going to swear here!) doctor that told me that my only hope to be a mother was IVF or IUI.
Hah.
I look forward to the next 100 posts and the adventures and the trials that lie before me. I also look forward to continue reading about all of my wonderful friends that I've been in the bloggosphere. Thank you all for your wonderful, encouraging words. You have all buoyed me through so many dark times. Although we are so very far apart geographically (with the exception of My Reality!), I often feel closer to all of you than my best friend who lives around the corner. Thank you for sharing your beautiful words with me, and I am so glad that I am not walking this journey alone.
So here it is. Post 100. I can't believe all that I've written and I may have to go back to my archives to see all of the things that I did write about!!!
So AYWH, I will get that B6 in the mail before the end of the week, I promise. Sorry again!
And thanks to Sew Infertile who sent me a St Gianna prayer card and some surprise homemade vanilla in the mail! It arrived today! Thanks so much!!!
And to all of you on my blog roll, I'm so sorry that I haven't been commenting on your blogs as of late. Hopefully I'll be feeling 100% soon and I'll get back to my old blogging habits!
p.s. I had an HCG accident this past weekend. Mr. JB usually mixes the sterile saline with the powder and then I inject myself. For some reason the old box of meds ended up in our medicine container and he ended up adding more sterile saline to a bottle of old solution! There was only a tiny bit left in the bottle and I did inject myself with it. It wasn't until the next day when I found the new box of HCG that was not mixed. I was pretty angry that he didn't pay close enough attention to what he was doing and that I had to give myself an extra needle. So he mixed up the new meds and I injected myself on Peak +4. I have to give myself my needle tonight and then I go for blood tomorrow for Peak +7. Or should I wait until Peak +8? Advice anyone?
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Congrats on this wonderful milestone!! Isn't it amazing how they accumulate and the next thing you know, you are at triple digits?
ReplyDeleteI really hope that your appointment goes well and that you are able to realize your dream the way that you want.
ps - should I be embarrassed that your students speak better French than I who took six years of French from middle school through college?
As for the HCG question, I am so sorry but I have no idea on that one!!
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to say congrats on making it to the 100th post, I know it's not easy to maintain the blogging (and the struggle to get pregnant!) but somehow God helps us through, doesn't He?
I am SO excited to see what 2009 has in store for all of us Catholic IF bloggers.
Praying for your upcoming appointment, too.
Feel better soon, JB!
ReplyDeleteHappy 100th!! And congrats on being such a fantastic teacher that your kids are already speaking in past tense, conjugating correctly and all!!
ReplyDeleteI cannot WAIT to read your next 100 posts- all about your pregnancy and motherhood :)
I hope the next 100 are dramatically different.
ReplyDeleteHappy 100th post! Hope you are feeling much better now.
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