19 August 2010

It would've been...

...poetic justice.

Saturday would have been Peak +17. Yes, the day of the scandalous wedding.

Alas, yet again AF has decided to show up, ever so lightly but there nonetheless.

I talked myself down all day. I had the conflicting voices going on in my head, "It could be...Don't be silly...Well it's already 7pm and AF hasn't arrived yet...Maybe????"

I need to channel the feelings that I felt on Sunday. I need to remember that the fruits of all of the prayer and the wonderful blessings from Fr. Mike will make my dreams come true.

I will be a mother.

I don't need to despair.

But knowing this didn't stop me from breaking down. I'm so good at keeping it together, or at least seeming like I am together. I could've won an Oscar.

Or twenty.

I have to pray harder. I have to believe more. I have to be willing to let my heart hope.

For now, I am going to order some more F.emara.

There's always next month....
Posted by at

15 comments:

  1. Jeremiah 29:1119 August 2010 at 20:39

    Praying for you...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous19 August 2010 at 20:41

    Your in my prayers!

    ReplyDelete
  3. barbie19 August 2010 at 21:19

    something big is coming for you and TCIE, i can feel it! praying for you, as always!

    ReplyDelete
  4. FET Accompli19 August 2010 at 21:34

    Sending hugs and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Amazing Life19 August 2010 at 22:06

    oh, hon! I am so sorry, but please know you do not have to pray harder - you are doing everything just as God would expect you. You will be a mother - I believe it with all of my heart!! Sending prayers your way!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Leila@LittleCatholicBubble20 August 2010 at 00:10

    Darn!

    Well, all it means is one more month closer to when you WILL be a mother! I will keep praying! But I think you've brought in the "big guns" with that wonderful priest!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Amy @ This Cross I Embrace20 August 2010 at 01:17

    Oh screw :(

    I'm so sorry. But I think your time is soon... and more importantly, I think you are NEXT.

    I really, really do.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous20 August 2010 at 08:57

    Ugh. Sorry :(.
    I really hope your dreams come true soon.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Awaiting a Child of God:)20 August 2010 at 10:58

    Soo frustrating! Sorry dear...Hugs

    ReplyDelete
  10. Living Advent20 August 2010 at 12:28

    Oh JB, I'm so sorry... I wish there was something I could say or do... Other than pray of course which I'm doing right now.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sarah20 August 2010 at 13:18

    You are in my heart. Good luck. You are right, next month is right around the corner.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Vent-ilation20 August 2010 at 15:43

    Will there at least be drinks at this wedding? Ugh... I'm sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  13. mrsblondies20 August 2010 at 18:53

    Sorry about CD 1. I'm praying for you and I hope your day comes very soon.

    ReplyDelete
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