19 August 2010

It would've been...

...poetic justice.

Saturday would have been Peak +17. Yes, the day of the scandalous wedding.

Alas, yet again AF has decided to show up, ever so lightly but there nonetheless.

I talked myself down all day. I had the conflicting voices going on in my head, "It could be...Don't be silly...Well it's already 7pm and AF hasn't arrived yet...Maybe????"

I need to channel the feelings that I felt on Sunday. I need to remember that the fruits of all of the prayer and the wonderful blessings from Fr. Mike will make my dreams come true.

I will be a mother.

I don't need to despair.

But knowing this didn't stop me from breaking down. I'm so good at keeping it together, or at least seeming like I am together. I could've won an Oscar.

Or twenty.

I have to pray harder. I have to believe more. I have to be willing to let my heart hope.

For now, I am going to order some more F.emara.

There's always next month....

13 comments:

  1. something big is coming for you and TCIE, i can feel it! praying for you, as always!

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  2. oh, hon! I am so sorry, but please know you do not have to pray harder - you are doing everything just as God would expect you. You will be a mother - I believe it with all of my heart!! Sending prayers your way!

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  3. Darn!

    Well, all it means is one more month closer to when you WILL be a mother! I will keep praying! But I think you've brought in the "big guns" with that wonderful priest!!

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  4. Oh screw :(

    I'm so sorry. But I think your time is soon... and more importantly, I think you are NEXT.

    I really, really do.

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  5. Ugh. Sorry :(.
    I really hope your dreams come true soon.

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  6. Oh JB, I'm so sorry... I wish there was something I could say or do... Other than pray of course which I'm doing right now.

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  7. You are in my heart. Good luck. You are right, next month is right around the corner.

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  8. Will there at least be drinks at this wedding? Ugh... I'm sorry.

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  9. Sorry about CD 1. I'm praying for you and I hope your day comes very soon.

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