23 November 2011

Hope in the Doctor's Office

In the past six plus years of IF, I have spent a lot of time at the doctor's office.

I would love to be able to erase my pre-Napro experiences where IVF and ill-timed drugs were pushed on me. I would also love to be able to say that all of my doctors have treated my infertility with respect, but I can't. More than once I was made to feel like I had some horrible disease and that my anti-ART stance was unfathomable.

I am so blessed to have such a wonderful and supportive local Napro doctor who has helped me forget her predecessors.

I was instructed by Dr. Hilgers and his nurses to get my incision looked at since it just wasn't getting better. So my dad picked me up early this morning so we could get in line to see Dr. T for her walk-in hours. We were there forty-five minutes before the office opened and we weren't even first!

Dr. T was so happy to hear how wonderful my experience in Omaha was. I also told her that I would speak personally to any patients that were considering surgery in the US since I was treated so well. I went over what happened at both my procedures and she was more than impressed. She also said that she wishes that Dr. Hilgers worked up here since he is so great. I could tell that she holds him in the highest esteem!

Near the end of my visit with Dr. T I told her about my surgery rosaries. I pulled out my trusty i.Phone to show her and she was overcome.
 Can you spot the pain pump button? I loved that thing!
Now I've said before that Dr. T has believed in my ability to conceive when I had given up. If it wasn't for her and Mr. JB I would've thrown in the towel a LONG time ago. At every appointment she encourages and supports us. If it wasn't for her I wouldn't have even considered going for broke (literally and figuratively) and having surgery with Dr. Hilgers.

As she stood beside me looking at the images on my phone I could tell that she was moved. She turned to me and said, "This is going to work. I know it." And then she gave me a big hug.

We ended the appointment both in tears!

So the fifty percent that Dr. Hilgers quoted seems so much more hopeful. I guess I needed to hear Dr. T's reassurances which I didn't realize I needed so badly. She is so excited to be working closely with Dr. Hilgers. I have quite the team behind me!

Again I have to say, I feel at peace. Our journey has been long, but I know that the Lord has us exactly where we need to be.

So I will continue to nurse my yucky incision and take my antibiotics (yuck!). And when the anxiety creeps in I will remember to offer it up for my friends that are still waiting -- I was wide away at 2am and it took saying a rosary to put me to sleep.

And the next time I feel like my journey to motherhood is just a bit too long for my liking I am going to read this post, but I may need some reminding to check back here...

19 comments:

  1. If it makes you feel even better ... I have not given up hope for you --- not even for one second, not by a longshot! And now with the "new you" :):) oh I am just brimming with excitement!

    Try and keep your spirits up and remember, you are STARTING OVER! the clock has been RESET!!!! Its like someone just went and rebuilt the engine of a car ... its a whole new car, right?!!! But the same:) Man, I am just so happy for you!! Praise be to God for Dr. H, for his professional vocation, and many prayers are with you.

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  2. I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Many fertile blessings are being sent your way.

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  3. How wonderful for you to have Dr. T! She sounds like such a blessing!! I'm really praying for you JB... I know your wait has been long. And I know it is really hard to reset your "emotional" clock. Keep hoping!! :) Hugs!

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  4. I am in tears reading this...

    I'm am so hopeful for you and your DH...don't give up that hope! I'm so excited to see where this path will lead yall!

    You are in my prayers, you strong chica! ;)

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  5. What a beautiful post. She is such a blessing for you, and I think she is right...this IS going to work for you!

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  6. This post made me emotional too! God has brought you to the right place with the right people. Praying you get good news soon.

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  7. Dr. T sounds like an angel. I'm so glad she gives you all that TLC! I hope your incision heals soon. God bless you and Happy Thanksgiving!

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  8. Continued prayers. I loved Dr. T. I wish she was over here. You are lucky to have your pick, so to speak, in Toronto.

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  9. I knew 50% didn't sound so bad! :) Don't forget to take your probiotics. Maybe some nice fermented cabbage?

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  10. wow, that is so awesome! I have not given up hope either!!!

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  11. I too am in tears reading this.

    Yay for hope and for loving doctors!

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  12. I'm crying! I can just picture being there when your doctor was overcome. I had a doctor like that and it helped SO much. Sometimes other people have to fill in the gaps where we lack hope. I know it's going to work too!

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  13. So happy that you've found hope!

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  14. Oh JB I pray it DOES WORK!!! I love the surgery rosary. Haven't seen one before and can imagine the peace it helped give you during such a scary time;)

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  15. Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. Those pics made me tear up too. And don't forget it's 50% WITHOUT any meds! So with meds it's even higher!!!

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  16. Dr. T sounds amazing! It is so wonderful when they REALLY care and you are more than just a patient. Many fertile blessings your way ... And I hope your incision heals soon!!!

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  17. I still have my rosaries that they taped on my hands for each surgery. I love that they do that.

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  18. This made me weepy - so sweet! JB, you are so strong!!!

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  19. Such an awesome post. And thank you for your offered-up prayers, I can feel them!!

    So, when can you try again??

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