I apologize for not updating yesterday. I cannot believe how tiring it was to be a passenger that got to sleep most of the way (thankfully I was asleep since Iowa wasn't the most exciting state to drive through!). I am so grateful that Mr. JB didn't mind that I was comatose for most of the trip.
I'm also glad that I waited a day to post after my appointment with Dr. Hilgers. I was an emotional wreck after seeing him. I recognize now that I am over-tired, in pain and have been away from home for longer than I thought we would be, but that reality didn't hit me until yesterday.
Dr. Hilgers was late for our 1:30pm appointment which was first since arriving in Omaha -- waiting is normal in doctor's offices back home, but we waited for nothing at CUMC and PPVI. Apparently he had a really long surgery (probably someone that had a 6 1/2 whopper that I had!) so we didn't see him until almost 2:30pm. I'm sure that the Lord wanted to show us that our waiting was not over!
He went over the DVD of my second-look lap and Dr. Hilgers was almost giddy, which I take as a good sign. It was hard to watch the bloody parts since I am so squeamish. It was great to see how adhesion-free my insides were, particularly since the surgery pictures from the first time around were pretty gross! Dr. Hilgers was so happy that the dye flowed through each of my tubes and that everything looked good (to my untrained eye it didn't, but according to him it did!). The one thing that he mentioned more than once was that he probably should've removed the right ovary which was most likely damaged from my first laparatomy. The right tube is now open and he did say that it could still ovulate so I am very glad that he didn't remove it.
Seeing the DVD also helped me understand why I am in so much pain! It is amazing how much work he did inside of me. It is still unbelievable that I am now endo and adhesion free!
Dr. Hilgers also mentioned that I had some inflammation in my rectum (eewww!) that he is going to treat to antibiotics. At the end of our appointment he asked if we had any questions and I asked the biggest question of my life, "So what are our chances now?"
And he said, "Fifty percent."
My heart fell. I tried to keep the tears at bay because I didn't want to ugly cry in front of him. Logically, after having a day to digest the information I know that we had no chance before my surgeries with him -- Dr. Hilgers said as much. We have a 50% chance without any meds, which is miraculous enough in itself. Now that I am his patient, we have a much better chance at conceiving. I am not doubting my Napro doctor back home, but this is the big Kahuna!
Mr. JB has reminded me many times that this is a process and now we're starting off at the beginning. I need to reset my TTC clock back to zero, easy to write, but way harder to do after slogging it out for so long. Mr. JB also reminds me that I am healthy now. No more pain. Dr. Hilgers was very happy to hear that the nagging pelvic pain that I have suffered with since the pelvic abscess of 2009 is gone. I do have pain still, but it's healing pain.
I have to speak to the nurses at PPVI on Monday and I know I will have many more questions as the fog lifts from all the pain killers. I also have to call in four weeks for another update.
For now, I have to focus my energies on healing. The enormity of our trip is just hitting me now and I know that in my heart that we made the right decision to go for broke and see Dr. Hilgers.
No regrets. Absolutely none.
Now, the next task is to get changed and get out on the highway. I have never missed my house more!
Thank you for all your prayers and support!