But I can't get the thought that the office was supposed to be our nursery and that it seems like we are so far from putting a crib in the room.
Our little house was the first one that we looked at. We didn't even have our shoes off when my hubby announced, "I like it. Let's get it." I remember going upstairs for the first time and thinking that the little bedroom would be the perfect spot for our baby JellyBelly's since it's directly across the hall from our bedroom. I could picture a crib, a changetable and a glider. I imagined getting up in the middle of the night to change diapers. And most of all, waking up in the morning to collect my bundle of joy.
That was all before my uterus went on the fritz.
But is it really on the fritz? Evil fertility doctor and nice ob/gyn both say that there's nothing wrong with me. Hubby's little swimmers are in fine form. I have clear tubes and I ovulate on day 14.
But it's been two and a half years and nothing.
So do I just bite my lip and go to Ikea and get the furniture that I've been admiring in the catalog? Is it signaling defeat if I get rid of my old furniture? Am I saying goodbye to the dream that the room will be a nursery? I feel like I'm cheating on the hope of my future baby if I even get into the car and drive towards the store.
I realize that the furniture can easily be moved into the guest room or even to the basement. I can take it apart as easily as I put it together (Mr. JellyBelly does not put anything together at our house! He lacks the male handyman gene.).
Perhaps doing a little makeover will make it easier to work in the room. I know that pretty, organized spaces make me happy. I also know that the current state of the office is driving me a little batty. Essentially it's where all the crap goes when we don't know where to put it. It's my room of shame and no one is allowed to go near it.
So what to do? Any advice out there in the bloggosphere?