24 May 2014

Wallowing in self-pity

My week went from bad to worse. 

Although we are happy with who will be fixing Mr JB's car, it looks like it's going to take a week AND it's going to cost closer to $2000. 

Ouch. 

On the bright side, the mechanic gave us a loaner so we don't have to pay for a rental car. 

I also had an extra difficult week with my class.  The weather has gotten warmer and their behaviour (something I have worked so hard on with them!) has gotten worse AND I was so frustrated because half the class was not grasping the math concepts we are learning. 

On Thursday afternoon one of my students knocked over a paper organizer (one of those three tiered metal things) on my desk and then flat out denied that he has anything to do with it. By that point in the day I was so frustrated that I almost started to cry. The one thing that saved me was one of my little firecrackers got up and said loudly and firmly (with a lot of attitude), "No, I saw you knock it over! Now go clean it up!" By the time the dismissal bell rang, I was able to have a calm talk with the little guy. I asked him why I was upset and he knew that it was because he lied, not because he knocked the thing down. 

Taking ownership over our actions is not a strong suit for my students. 

To top off my long and frustrating week (and it was only a four day week because of Victoria Day on Monday!), I ended up in the ER after school. 

I have been battling a nasty cold all week and my cough had gotten so bad that it was affecting my breathing. I called my GP at lunch, but the office closed at 1. By the end of the school day I knew that the asthma meds I had on hand weren't going to do the trick. Lucky for me, I was seen right away and I was given three breathing treatments back to back. By the second treatment I felt relief.  The doctor (who was wearing a Batman belt and really cool glasses) sent me for a chest X-ray, just to make sure and it came out all clear. 

I'm still feeling crummy and woosy from the medication they gave me last night, but my breathing is so much better. 

And the cherry on top of my craptastic week: Yesterday was CD1. 

Yes, even when one has moved on to being pg on paper, it still sucks big, fat donkey balls. 

We were invited to a wedding today, so I have to buck up and feel better by 2pm. Apparently we're sitting with a colleague of Mr JB's (who has successfully done IVF twice) -- yes friends, she is also a Catholic teacher.  I'm almost thankful that I feel sick so we won't have to stay late and make small talk. I wish I could stay home and watch movies and drink tea with my heating pad on my belly! 

I guess I'm going to have plenty to offer up.....

















13 comments:

  1. So sorry your week has been bad. I will pray for you today as you go to that wedding. If you could pray for our retreat for couples dealing with infertility/miscarriage I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you!

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    1. I'll definitely pray for you and your retreat!

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  2. Thank you for sharing this. I teach second grade as well, and also had a difficult week at work. My class led their first Mass (that was stressful!)and for most it was their first Mass after their first communion. I have definitely wallowed in self pity, worrying that I will never be a mom and share that special day with my own child. Being a teacher struggling with infertility can feel like torture sometimes. Anyway, I hope you feel better soon. I will pray for you and your class of little angels. :)

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    1. The hardest part teaching this class is that if we did conceive when we first got married that our child would be in grade two as well. I try not to dwell on it, but it makes a particularly difficult class even more difficult some days.

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  3. Sorry your week was crappy. Praying for you and for things to get better!

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    1. Really, it can only go up from here!

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  4. I remember the end of the year craziness with my kiddos when I was teaching as well...with this new gig..my littles are on vacation...so there is no excitement! They do get excited to go to prek...it's cute! Good luck at the wedding...ugh...I can't stand when people ask me about IVF or surrogacy. Really? Do you really think that is for everyone? A good friend even offered to be a surrogate for us and she knows we are practicing Catholics! It wasn't even tempting.

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  5. Ugh. That sounds awful! I guess next week has to be better, right?

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  6. That sounds TERRIBLE!!! All of it!!! Sending prayers and ((((hugs)))).

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  7. Oh, man! I'm sorry. Sounds like a ringer of a week. I know what you mean about DC1 still hurting, even when you're pg on paper. As time goes by without a match AND CD1s keep happening, my hope is dashed even more . It's not a fun feeling. Hugs and prayers for the journey!

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  8. I am so sorry your week was bad. I hope you start feeling better soon! Hugs and prayers.

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  9. So sorry to hear about your stressful week. I'm glad to hear that you're feeling a bit better health-wise, and hoping God will 'throw you a bone' this week :) prayers!

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  10. Wow, all of that would really get under my skin. Is it frowned upon to shout at one's students? I don't think I would make it ten minutes as an elementary teacher!

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