31 January 2013


If you asked me on my wedding day in 2005 what my journey to motherhood would be like, I would not have had any idea.

I’ve journeyed long.

Very, very long.

And I’ve shed so many, many tears.

And I’m still here.

Four surgeries.

Thousands and thousands of dollars spent.

Injections. Pills. Supplements. Suppositories.

I’ve thought so many times that I’d like to wake up from this dream.

If only it was a dream.

I thought that after emptying our bank account (and then some) we would be closer to becoming biological parents.

I thought that after many novenas, rosaries, pilgrimages to so many different churches in both Europe and North America that our prayers would be answered.

It seems like God has another plan for us.

A plan that has taken me a LONG time to come to terms with.

I am so thankful for Amy and her idea to adopt-a-blogger. Mr. JB and I start our next phase of our adoption journey this month. I finally feel ready to get started on our  home study.

It took seven and a half years. Four surgeries. Countless appointments with numerous doctors.

And completely losing it in July when we found out that I just wasn’t ovulating (which I still believe to be at the core of our problem now that I have a freed pelvis and no more endo).

So as I venture into the 2WW and I ask my posse of saints: St. Gianna, Sts. Ann and Joachim, St. Gerard and Blessed John Paul II as well as my patron for 2013, St. Philip, I am welcoming all of your prayers. I know that it is because of this wonderful blogging community that I have not lost my mind.

Please pray that the next steps in our new journey are not fraught with landmines. It seems as though God wanted to test us to see if we were 100% ready to become parents.

Or at least that is what I’m telling myself.

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. And apparently, I’m training to become the strongest lady in the world.


If you want more information about Adopt-A-Blogger head over and visit Amy at her blog.


  1. I'm not the best at commenting on blogs, but I have been reading yours and praying for you often. My heart truly goes out to you. I will be praying for you and your husband as you continue your adoption journey. I was adopted at 4 months old, and understand both sides...the blessing of adoption and the longing for biological children. You have my prayers, always. Hugs to you.

  2. You know I'm praying for you! I am so happy to read that your heart is feeling more at peace and that your home study is coming up. I am in my 2ww right now (P+6), and I am totally asking the Lord to give this cycle to you - however He sees fit, with a BFP or with a smooth home study process.

    Love you!

  3. Praying over here too! I love St. Philip Neri - I often think of him as the Saint of Joy because he was well known for the joy that radiated from him. I will pray you will be blessed with abundant joy SOON!

  4. Hello!

    I am your newest follower and your newest prayer warrior :) Husband and I have been TTC for approximately 4 years so I feel your pain-- minus the 3 years longer you've been trying. You are to be admired for your strength and courage-- especially as you continue on and open your heart to God possibly leading you in a different parenting direction. You will be my main focus this month and I hope at the end of this month you will feel an enormous amount of peace and comfort.


  5. I'm excited to pray for you this month! May God shower you with his love & peace!

  6. Praying for you & Mr. JB this month!

  7. I'm SO excited for your adoption journey to unfold! Praying for you, as always :)

  8. I am honored to offer my month for you! I am very excited for you in what I hope is this last leg of your journey to become a mom ... and am excited to see what the fruit of our combined prayer for you is at the end of this month!!!
    My husband is very frustrating at times, so I'm confident I have a lot to offer up for you. :-D

  9. Love and prayers for you JB!

  10. Praying! Can't wait to see how all those prayers are answered.

  11. So excited to pray for you this month!

  12. Praying! Excited to hear about your adoption journey. Hugs!

  13. So excited for you and your DH on this next step! I love all those saints too...intercede please!!!

  14. Praying for you JB! I will offer up my shots this month for you...they are such a pain...no pun intended.

  15. meant to comment earlier but it is all offered up for you this month! what a great idea and I'm so happy to be able to participate in this for you :)

  16. You've been in my daily prayers since you were my prayer buddy. I'm ramping it up girl!!! Here we go...

  17. Praying so hard for you, JB! Definitely offering up all frustrations this month especially for you!!

  18. Praying for you... and for straight paths before you!

  19. I'm praying for you and offering up all my surgery recovery for you. :)

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