Mr. JB and I are celebrating our annual "Wear PJ's all day and do nothing" day. Since we got married we always designate one day from our Christmas vacation to just being lazy since we are always so busy over the holidays.
My eyes are doing much better, but the later the day gets, the blurrier my vision is. I haven't used any moisturizing drops today which is a big improvement. We have a humidifier going so our house air isn't dry, which is a help. I've noticed that at my fertile bf's house my eyes are much drier since they don't have a humidifier. It doesn't help that it's been so cold up here and the furnace is running all the time. Judging from my recovery since the 20th, I'll be in teaching condition come the 3rd.
So we've had a bit of drama here at the JellyBelly household.
On Christmas Day we headed over to my aunt and uncle's house. Mr. JB's brother is in Italy so he brought his dad with us. It was great to not have to divide our time between two locations and I also woke up in my own bed (last year was the first time I got to wake up in my own bed on Christmas morning!).
I'm the eldest girl granddaughter on my mom's side and I have a really close relationship with my cousins, particularly the other girls. My youngest cousin K, was playing with our cousin NR's i.Touch while we were hanging out after opening our gifts. K loves to play with my i.Phone (I don't believe that she's allowed to have her own cell phone) and she found NR's "notes." K has written me notes on my phone a few times just to play around (she's 13, what can you expect?). She opened up a note that NR wrote called "Sh*t I have to buy." She thought that it was funny until she read the list.
The list started with a bunch of normal stuff like deodorant and batteries. When K got to the last list item, she showed me the i.Touch.
NR had condoms as her last item.
I started to interrogate K when she showed the list to me. At first I was convinced that she had written it herself and was showing me to get a rise out of me. I asked K to look at me in the eye and I knew that she had nothing to do with it. NR had written it herself.
We whispered to the other female cousin, V, who is in her early 20's about the note. She was as shocked as we were. V and NR spend quite a bit of time together so I asked her to talk to her about what we saw. There is no way that I can talk to her without losing my mind. I'm also so much older that she sees me in the same light as her mom and our other aunts. I think that coming from her cooler cousin that the interrogation will be taken better.
V and I were texting back and forth today and she said that she already has a plan in place and that she will definitely talk to NR on New Year's Eve. NR is only 15 and I worry so much that she is sexually active. She's been having problems in school and she is a bit overweight. I gave her a tough time in the fall because she wasn't asking me for help with school. She almost failed grade nine geography and didn't ask either Mr. JB or myself to help her out. Her parents are also living way above their means and they aren't home because they're always working.
Could you please say a prayer for NR if you get the chance? I really hope that she isn't doing that she shouldn't be. I wasn't interested in sex at all at 15, but my parents watched me like a hawk and I had very strict rules to follow. My aunt and uncle are very easy-going parents and I'm so worried that they are going to be grandparents sooner, rather than later.
On to drama number two.
So Mr. JB's dad stayed with us for a few days, like I mentioned earlier. He went home yesterday morning because there was a birthday party that he was going to attend. We had a function at our parish that we help out at, so we stayed in town. This morning there was a message on our voice mail from Mr. JB's dad so Mr. JB called him back.
What happened afterward came totally out of left field.
Mr. JB's dad said that he was really upset because we weren't thankful enough for our Christmas presents. He gave a cheque to go towards a new washer and dryer (my parents contributed as well). Mr. JB opened up the card and I know that we both said thank you, but perhaps it got lost in the shuffle of opening up all of our gifts. We have noticed this Mr. JB's dad has had issues with hearing in the past year and we've both been urging him to get it checked.
Then my FIL starting accusing us of forgetting to send Mr. JB's brother a card for Christmas -- which we didn't do, but it was just an oversight on our part. We spoke to my BIL via S.kype on Christmas Eve, Christmas and Boxing Day and it wasn't even mentioned. He did send us little gifts, but when he's away we do not normally send gifts. I know that cards are a big deal for Mr. JB's family (it isn't in mine) so I know that his feelings were hurt.
My Mr. JB is very generous to his brother and I do have to say that I was shocked that it was even mentioned.
We both figured that my FIL was being nit-picky and that the stress of having his girlfriend so sick (she was put in a home almost a year ago) and a few close family friends passing away in the recent past, have taken a toll on him. He's lived alone for a long time, but he hasn't been without a companion in over 15 years. But we were wrong.
Mr. JB sent a long e-mail to his brother, who is currently vacationing in Venice, and the response we got was even more shocking.
My BIL wrote at length about how hurt he was about not receiving a Christmas card. Then he went on say that he was worried about the state of our marriage. He said that Mr. JB was doing most of the work and that I was making all of the decisions. He said that that he was worried about the future of our marriage and that we both had to do an examination of consciousness -- since we flit about like chickens without heads (we're busy people, both with full-time jobs and many volunteer commitments, sue us).
Mr. JB and are just shocked. Fine be hurt about the card, but the last thing he needs to worry about is our marriage. I do admit that Mr. JB does most of the cooking, but that's because he comes home earlier than I do. He is also very territorial about "his" kitchen. With my new grade change and the other commitments I have outside of the home, Mr. JB does do more of the day to day stuff around our house, and I do finances and that kind of stuff.
Our IF has brought us closer together and we talk about EVERYTHING. There isn't an issue that I can think of that we don't discuss -- which I'm sure is true for so many of you our there. Mr. JB and I are the type that don't have a censor. What comes to mind, comes out of our mouths. It's one of the biggest reasons why our marriage is so strong.
It really bothers me when I'm accused of "hen-pecking" my husband, something which he thoroughly disagrees with. Mr. JB doesn't like to make big decisions and I do. We do talk about the state of affairs on a constant basis, but Mr. JB does not like paying bills or thinking about our investments.
I hate seeing Mr. JB so upset. He doesn't deal well with strife, particularly with his brother. His stomach has been upset and he's been withdrawn all day. I'm used to dealing with the dramatics of my family, particularly my parents. I can brush off altercations with my parents, just because I have more practice -- ha ha.
I'm thinking that Mr. JB and I are the victims of two people that spend too much time alone with their thoughts. I hope and pray that this is something that is worked out soon because I can't stand the drama!
I hope that all of you are having a great fourth day of Christmas -- hopefully drama free!