Our first weekend of P.RIDE training went well. The first day was overwhelming, but I'm so glad that we are taking the course. From what we can guess, there is only one non-IF couple in the class with us!
After the first day I was almost 100% certain that we were going to pursue international adoption, but yesterday there was a guest speaker that planted another seed. She said that the C.hildren's A.id Soc.iety is looking for mixed race couples, particularly Caucasian/Asian and Caucasian/Black couples. Apparently there aren't a lot of biracial couples that are looking to adopt!
The CAS adoption is definitely attractive for one big reason: cost. There isn't one (although we decided to pay for our adoption training and most likely will be paying for our own home study -- I'm done with waiting!!). It would also help with my plan to be a stay-at-home mom AND we do have the HUGE debt we are still paying off to Omaha.
I am definitely excited by the new options. I have felt so frustrated at the doors that seem to have been closing for us, this weekend just showed us that there are more avenues that we can pursue to become parents!
I also know that I am going to need to do some therapy before we go too far into our new journey. I haven't gotten past the anger of IF and I want to be able to work through those feelings. I knew that the time was coming, and we talked about all the feelings of loss that adoption can bring about. I am tired of carrying the weight of my sadness around.
So there we are. I can't wait until next weekend. It definitely is a big perk being an educator since we seemed to know so many of the answers!