A Strange Anniversary

A year ago today I had my first surgery.

And I found out that my ladyparts were a huge, horrible mess.

If you want a refresher, check this out.

It was quite the diagnosis to get. I had a feeling that it was bad, but stage IV (and as my surgeon said, stage IV IV), ovarian cysts, uterine fibroids, adhesions that were so bad that my right fallopian tube was obstructed.

Ouch.

So after four months of lovely L.upron and having to deal with hot flashes and crazy hormones, I got to have my second surgery which was much more intensive and that cleaned everything up.

Yay.

I wish that I could say that all is wonderful and that I'm 100% confident that we will conceive, but we've had five cycles post L.upron and still nothing (although I'm Peak +5 today so who knows...). I see my Napro doctor next week to see if doubling the dose of F.emara has helped my hormone levels go up since the HCG just wasn't enough. I'm almost sure that it has helped since I had boob tenderness and acne for the first time in AGES!

The one thing that I've learned through all of this is that I'm used to disappointment. I've had almost five years to learn how to deal with it. I'm not saying that I'm good at dealing with it, but I'm no longer falling apart on CD1.

My next biggest hurdle is completing the adoption paperwork. The scariest part is having to get a criminal check from France since I lived there for more than six months. I can imagine how difficult that is going to be!

Thank you for all of you support, if it wasn't for all of you I wouldn't have been able to get through both surgeries and the horrible recovery. I know that I hated the belly button and lower abdomen scar, but they've both healed up nicely. I have battle scars leading me to motherhood, I just hope that it can be sooner, rather than later.