26 March 2012

Please pray!

We just got the news that Mr. JB's uncle Jack passed away this morning. He was 89 years old and had 10 children (one of which died of cancer a few years back).  His wife passed away 26 years ago.

He told the attendant at his home that he was feeling good today. He closed his eyes and that was it. 

He was one of those people that you thought would live forever.

He had a massive stroke thirteen years ago and lay on the floor for sixteen hours until someone found him.

Let's just say that he was a tough, tough man.

Please pray for his children, his grandchildren and his surviving siblings.

Uncle Jack, may you rest in peace. Until we meet again.

21 March 2012

JellyBelly vs. Her Insurance Company

Firstly, I know that I am blessed to have free health care in Canada and that the majority of my prescription drugs are covered.

Until recently, the only prescription that I have had to pay for out-of-pocket was Lo.w D.ose Nal.trexone. Unfortunately, I have just found out that my wonderful compounded T3 is not covered, and possibly the DHEA that I've been taking.

I'm currently on hold with a customer service representative who is checking if S.ynthroid and Ar.mour are covered.

Anyone out there with experience with either drug? I've been stable on the 30mg of T3 and I've been so happy with it. I haven't had a side effect in so long!

I really can't afford to dish out for drugs if I can find an alternative!


Update: Syn.throid is covered, but the rep couldn't find information on Ar.mour. 

19 March 2012

Happy Feast of St. Joseph!

St. Joseph has a very special place in my heart.

I was born at St. Joseph Hospital. He is also the patron saint of Canada. Most recently, I had my surgeries at St. Joseph Hospital in Omaha. And most importantly, I am married to a Joseph.

One of my first memories of learning about St. Joseph was a statue in the parish that I grew up in. The altar was flanked by a statue of Joseph on one side and Mary on the other. I can't recall who told me who he was, but I was fascinated by the statue of the man that held a hammer (my dad is super handy so I assumed that all dads knew how to fix things). I said many, many prayers in front of that statue and I never realized how instrumental he would be in my life.

I have blogged many times about how optimistic my husband is. I am so blessed that he has the amazing belief that we will be biological parents. I have told him many times that if it wasn't for him that I would've given up a long time ago.

So I've decided to step up my prayers to St. Joseph. I don't know why I didn't realize it sooner, but I feel called to petition him for our baby.

I'm doing this for selfish reasons as well. If I am ever blessed to have a son he will be named Joseph (like his dad and his grandfather -- it's a family tradition). I hope and pray that I get the chance!

St. Joseph, pray for us!

14 March 2012

Greetings from AZ!

We are having a wonderful vacation.

I've been able to sleep in, read and just enjoy doing nothing.

[insert happy sigh here]

We arrived late Saturday (although our plane was half an hour early getting in!) and Sunday was Mr. JB's cousin's wife's birthday, so they hosted a barbecue for their friends and family. I was feeling quite tired so I took a long nap in the middle of the party. I have never dealt well with time changes, so I needed the rest.

On Monday we had lunch at a vegan restaurant in Phoenix. It was a strange experience and the service was horrible, but the food was delicious. We went to a neighbouring used book store to get some more books since Mr. JB and I are finishing all of of our vacation reading!

Yesterday we went to Tucson. We went on a short hike (Mr. JB hates hikes!) in Catalina State Park. We took the path to see the wildflowers. I love how the flowers grow in the desert among the cacti. I took so many pictures. Afterward we headed to downtown Tucson. We drove around and visited St. Augustine Cathedral -- what a beautiful church! We finished off the evening at El Charro, a fantastic Mexican restaurant. The woman that founded the restaurant's father built the cathedral, so it was like our day came full circle. I can't wait to have my leftovers!

We're having a lazy day today. We're about an hour outside of Phoenix, so we decided to stay local since we drove so much yesterday and Monday. I think that we're going to see a movie and then just hang out by the pool.

Unfortunately, I won't be seeing the wonderful AZ bloggers Leila and Danya. We're just too far away and I don't feel comfortable asking to borrow our relatives' huge truck and traveling to the city on my own. This definitely isn't our last trip to the AZ, so we'll have to figure out something the next time we're here (which won't be too long!).

On the IF front: my CM has been so strange. I was told not to take C.lomid since my FSH was so high last cycle and I'm still taking a mucus enhancer. I usually have more 10KL going on, but I've had some strange brown mucus (sorry, TMI) and not too much CM. Very weird. I guess my body just wants to keep me guessing!

10 March 2012

Leaving on a jet plane...

I so need this vacation.

I am looking forward to being somewhere else. I am also hoping that I can leave as much of my IF baggage behind -- not likely since it looks like I will be ovulating while we're away.

I hope that the warm weather and not having to wear big, bulky clothing will help heal me physically and emotionally.

I just hope that this trip is uneventful. The last time we traveled to AZ, we got bumped from our flight.

Prayer buddy, I have been offering up all kinds of prayers for you!

I'll check in when we're down south!!

5 March 2012

JellyBelly, in love...

With aqua yoga-tai-lates.

My awesome chiropractor suggested trying some water exercise as I recuperate and I found a yoga-tai chi-pilates class in the water at my local community centre AND it's also in the warm therapy pool (the water temperature is 33C/92F) so the water is perfect.

Not only is the exercise more gentle, but I love that I feel so incredibly strong, and it's been a long time since I've felt strong.

I'm the second-youngest person in the class and I always do the modifications to make the exercises more difficult -- I was sore last week and I'm a little sore tonight, but I feel so good when I get home.

I'm feeling so much better physically that I think that I'm going to add another yoga class to my fitness schedule (I'm currently doing two easy classes: a Yin and a Restorative). There's an Ashtanga prep class on Saturday mornings that I am ready to return to after the March Break, which is two weeks earlier than I planned.

I know that my need to exercise is part of my need to control something in my body. IF has taken so much of my peace of mind and exercising is the one thing that I can do that can help me forget. I am also one of those strange people that enjoys the physical exertion of a good workout.  I know that I am still a long way away from being where I was physically before my surgeries, but being pain-free is a pretty awesome trade-off.

I am trying so hard to be gentle with myself. After two disappointing cycles, I know that I have to re-frame my thinking since these are our first actual fertile cycles ever (which is still hard to stomach since we have been married for over six years).

As I drove home from my class tonight I passed through the part of my neighbourhood that we want to live in. I know that the financial hardships that we are facing are going to be for good. I believe that the Lord is having me prioritize what we really need and not just what we want. I would love to have a beautiful detached home with a big yard, but we have a lovely, affordable home now.

And to top it off this time next week we will be in beautiful Arizona. I can't wait!!!

3 March 2012


I had the best dream last night.

The setting didn't quite make sense, but I was definitely at work (although it looked nothing like my school). Two of my colleagues that are "in the know" about my IF were forcing me to POAS (which all of you know, I do not do).

One of women brought me a test in bubble wrap (I have no idea what that means!) and she made me go to the washroom (which was MUCH nicer than the real facilities). I did the deed and when I looked down at the test it was positive.

In my dream I was shocked, but elated.

I even did the "When was the last time I took HCG?" count in my dream.

My other colleague took the test out of my hand and I said, "You know I just peed on that, don't you?"

The rest of the dreams blurs, but I woke up happy.

I'm considering this a sign of good things to come, although I don't think that I'm going to POAS in a staff washroom. Our school board buys clear garbage bags and I really don't want the custodian to see the box.

Btw, the DHEA is going well. I woke up with a headache yesterday morning and I was scared that it was related to the new medication, but this morning I was fine. Thank God!

1 March 2012

Another one bites the dust


AF showed up right after the dismissal bell.

I wasn't surprised since my boob tenderness was a lot less which is a sure sign that she was on her way.

But don't worry, I'm not completely gutted.

My Napro doctor was so hopeful yesterday. My estrogen and progesterone rock. My CM is great. My long luteal phases are a good thing. Her only concern is the tiny bit of brown bleeding at the end of my period. My FSH was also high (it was 15) so she wants me to take a break from Cl.omid (thank God!!!) for a month.

She had to leave my exam room for a little while to tend to another patient and I looked up high FSH and DHEA came up in my Dr. Google search. When we returned to the room I asked her for a prescription and she didn't hesitate.  I'm taking 25mg three times a day and I will be taking my first dose tonight.

Our last two cycles were good, fertile cycles. She assured me that it's just a matter of time.

Good thing that we're going on vacation in two weeks, perhaps that's all we need.

[insert sarcastic laugh here]

Prayer buddy, I know that I've been asking you to work your tail off for me. I felt your prayers, as well as the prayers of so many today. Thank God for all of you!